Your lazyass guide to the best songs of Eurovision 2021 (you’re welcome)

Your lazyass guide to the best songs of Eurovision 2021 (you’re welcome)
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You gotta love a bit of Eurovison, it’s quite possibly the gayest event on the planet and it is taking place NEXT WEEK. After last year’s slight issue of a global pandemic we couldn’t really have the contest we wanted but fear not, it is BACK BACK BACK!

In these troubled times however, who has the time to get involved and get to know the songs before the big night when there are SO many? Well you can thank us later but we have streamlined them into these essentials that cover a range from the best to the most queer to the downright bizarre (welcome to Eurovision)! Remember this is a SONG CONTEST and NOTHING to do with goddamn politics! No blurb (almost), just music. Enjoy. 










San Marino


We are a global magazine but we are based in the UK so we would be remiss not to give a special mention to James Newman who, after winning the competition to represent the UK last year then had ditch his song, so comes back this year with a new one. Go James! 

A special mention also has to go to Russia’s Manizha who has already angered Russian conservative groups with her song Russian Woman. She has been accused of ‘possible illegal statements’ by the Russian Union of Orthodox Women who called for a ban on her entry saying her lyrics incited ‘hatred towards men, which undermines the foundations of a traditional family’.

We ALL know Russia’s frankly hideous treatment for LGBT people so props to Manizha for stirring the pot and showing that the country isn’t just about repression and vilification. Hang on, didn’t we say no politics? Sorry not sorry. 

FINALLY, if what you need to see is a fantabulous medley of  ALL the entries,  they have kindly provided that too (see below)! It all kicks off in Rotterdam, Netherlands next Tuesday May 18 with the first semi-final with the grand finale on Saturday. Check local listings for how you can watch. Happy Eurovision 2021 peoples!

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